You need to make sure the splines are lined up. This can be checked by successfully sliding the axle into the housing. Once successful here back out the axle far enough to allow a good RAM, but not far enough that the splines disengage.

If the splines are aligned, the axle will be centered in the diff hole/seal and minimize any chance of seal damage.

If unsuccessful at the first attempt have the patience to keep repeating the spline alignment routine and ram process without becoming frustrated. Then in frustration ramming away carelessly with splines unaligned and risk seal damage.

The inner axle CV joint can expand/contract to adjust for suspension movement. If you push from the outboard side of this joint you will need to compress this joint before it bottoms out and starts applying force to overcome the circlip.

Have someone help you by holding the floppy end of axle and allow you to concentrate on alignment and installation. Hold the inner CV joint area when installing. You can hold the inboard metal area of the joint.

If your having a tough time remove the strut completely and drop the knuckle down to allow better access. You can take the knuckle off by unbolting the ball joint mount bolts and tie rod.

 

SUCCESS!!! Thanks for all the help and advice toyomoho.
I was able to get it done over the weekend and drove it about 50 miles - the wheel didnt fall off and doesnt look like any leaks so hopefully all is good.
Getting the axle in ended up being a 2 man job, or in my case a 1 man & 1 women job My wife helped by holding the axle and pushing / compressing the inner joint
then I whacked it with the dead blow hammer and it went in on our 2nd attempt.
I was as you said getting to my frustration point and starting to lose patience. If the car was on a lift I might have been able to ram it in by hand better but I was literally in a baseball catchers stance to do this and just couldnt generate the force needed. And I couldnt hold the axle well enough myself and generate any swing force with the hammer by myself. 2 people made it really easy. I was going to ask my 18 year old XBOX playing son for help but like I said I was already at my frustration point and Im sure that would have put me over the top!
The only other little thing I was doing wrong was when attempting to put the steering knuckle back into the strut. I did as you suggested by using my big screwdriver as a punch to line up the holes. For the life of me I couldnt get the bolts in. I did put the rotor back on and that certainly helped a bit but then I realized I had the screwdriver all the way through the top hole trying to get the bottom bolt in. After an hour or so I finally figured out I should only be sticking in the screwdriver halfway and putting the bolt into the same hole as the screwdriver is trying to align. Once I figured that out all went well.
Thanks again for all the help and all the experience I have gained!

 

Great job!

Thanks for posting back with your success.

Just a suggestion when doing frustrating jobs. This being to take a break. Perhaps clean up your work area and have a soda. Then come back and start anew. Besides saving on ones blood pressure it also can save on spending more time replacing parts damaged in frustration.